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imrickjmesbitch

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(5 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

one bad decision after another... [07 Apr 2006|06:26pm]
[ mood | discontent ]

that's the story of my fuckin' life.

i wish i wasn't so lazy, i wish i wasn't so unmotivated, i wish i wasn't so afraid to speak up, i wish i was going somewhere in my life, i wish i wasn't me...

(7 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

wow... [14 Oct 2005|10:01pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

http://www.peta2.com/TAKECHARGE/t-wetseal-moratorium.asp

oh my god...

i'm speechless...

i just want to cry...

(Slap Me)

hard times [09 Sep 2005|05:49pm]
[ mood | silly ]
[ music | fun lovin' criminals - scooby snacks ]

my nipples keep taking turns being hard.

weird!

(3 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

i half spic, i suck dick [09 Sep 2005|05:34pm]
[ mood | homosexual ]
[ music | rap (becasue i punk rock) ]

i street punk sam. i like leave words an leters also jumble words so hard making sentcne what i say. i like guys with to have se xand hair big and,curly look likescrawny gay mexcan chia pet. girlfirnd ashly likes stick butt in fingers and then sniff. why jsason rite this me dont' know???

(2 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

elise is the breast!!! [16 May 2005|09:34pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | tone loc - funky cold medina ]

that elise, how i miss her, love her, and still wish i was with her... and those giant knockers of hers.

*wipes tear*

(7 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

homophobes are closet queens [04 May 2005|10:15pm]
[ mood | pissed off ]
[ music | mike jones - still tippin' ]

i'm sick of being called derogatory gay terms. yes, i may dress like a gay man and occasionally kiss members of the same sex, but that doesn't give a person the right to name call; even if i was gay, it still wouldn't give a person the right to. it used to just hurt me, but now it hurts me and pisses me the fuck off. the next person who calls me a queer, homo, faggot, etc... to my face, who isn't my friend, is going to get their fuckin' ass kicked.

(1 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

that ain't sticky, that's sticks and stems [30 Apr 2005|08:35pm]
[ mood | geeky ]
[ music | all that remains - this darkened heart ]

i bought doom 3, it's pretty damn good. i want a psp really bad, but i'm thinking if i wait until christmas, maybe the price will go down.

work is going okay. if you come and visit me, don't litter.

i don't really have anything that important to say.

(11 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

jesus loves you... but he's not in love with you [10 Apr 2005|11:15pm]
[ mood | silly ]
[ music | wham! - wake me up before you go-go ]

i got nothin'.

(13 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

you as cold as ice, nigga [23 Mar 2005|10:50am]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | foreigner - cold as ice ]

so guess who gets to work on their birthday from 12 to 8... that's right, me! i get monday off, which is good, because it's the day i would have rather had off out of the two. we sell chocolate crosses at my work, which i think is just weird. i told katie it would be funny if we sold chocolate crucifixes with raspberry filling.

i saw one of the milfiest milfs i've seen in a long time, she was milftacular. she could have been the poster child, or should i say poster middle aged woman, for milfs.

i told katie i was going to get another girlfriend and a boyfriend, anyone wanna take one of those spots?

(8 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

the story of how katie got felt up by a middle aged woman... [12 Mar 2005|12:34pm]
[ mood | hungry (like the wolf) ]
[ music | the game - how we do ]

i got the job at walgreens, i worked my first day on thursday. it's easy work and i get pretty good hours. whoever comes and visits me first gets mad props, that's right, mad props.

the duran duran concert was good, i got a totally awesome shirt and some pins. it was like a convention for gays and middle aged women... i find myself somewhere in between the two. it was also mostly white people, it was like 96% white people, 3% asians, and 1% other (maybe). some ladies were in the wrong seats and as they were walking by katie, one "accidentally" tripped and touched katie's boob. yesterday i made up some lyrics about the boob touching incident to the tune of "hungry like the wolf", if i could remember i'd put them on here.

(7 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

katie is the bestest person ever [07 Mar 2005|09:07pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | d.v.d.a. - now you're a man ]

i have an interview at walgreens tomorrow. i better get the job, so i can get me some money and insurance.

i need to get my car fixed up, the digital dashboard flashes on and off and the car squeaks like a mother fucker.

i've been thinking of a few things to ask for for my birthday, here's what i've come up with so far: a cell phone (preferably the motorola v3 razr), south park seasons 1-5 on dvd, some movies, some clothes, a holder for my movies, games, and cds, a surround sound system... and that's all i can think of right now.

i think i have a heterosexual crush on ryan cabrera.

clamming with katie and her mom tomorrow, new season of south park on wednesday, duran duran concert on thursday, my birthday and the celebration of jesus rising from the dead on the 27th, as i lay dying and throwdown on the 28th, the special edition of 'orgazmo' coming out the 29th... could march be any fucking cooler?!


team america: world police comes out may 17th.

(4 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

do it or i'll kill you!!! [02 Mar 2005|11:46pm]
are we...
1. are we aquintences?
2. are we friends?
3. are we hook ups?
4. are we in a relationship?
5. are we gonna have kids?

am i...
1. am i smart?
2. am i cute?
3. am i funny?
4. am i cool?
5. am i the most brilliant person ever?

would you...
1. would you hang out with me?
2. would you date me?
3. would you be my hook up?
4. would you be my girlfriend/boyfriend?
5. would you have sex with me?

have you ever...
1. have you ever thought about me?
2. have you ever thought there might be an "us"?
3. have you ever thought about about hooking up with me?
4. have you ever found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
5. have you ever wished i were there?

are you's...
1. are you happy you know me?
2. are you mad at me?
3. are you thinkin bout me?
4. are you wishing you were with me?
5. are you gonna post this so i can return the favor?

(5 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

i thought i told y'all niggas befo', y'all niggas can't fuck with me [02 Mar 2005|11:16pm]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | mystikal - shake ya ass ]

my birthday is only 25 days away! what is everyone getting me?

i don't think joe will be able to go with me to the duran duran concert next thursday because of work, so if he can't, who wants to go in his place?

the last entry was written by ashley.

(6 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

¿quieres ir al parque zoologico a ver las jirafas conmigo? [28 Feb 2005|08:15pm]
[ mood | horny ]
[ music | im jerking sam off ]

jasons weird shit. sams weird shit. ashley ann days weird shit. shawnas weird shit. kiwi,banana, mango, tomato, potato, chocolate, swim caps, ocean, pool, la piscina, me gusta nadar en la piscina. jason. jason. no. no. no. chicken. chicken pot pie, chicken fried steak, chicken broth, chicken nuggets, boogers, chicken strips, chicken soup, chicken noodles, chicken bread, chicken cattiore (what the hell is that? who knows my mom is crazy. a crazy chef) chicken enchaladas. pot roast. jason roasted. peanuts, peanut butter, peanut butter fudge, sam, sams curly hair, sams mom, sams nails, sams lip ring, sams teeth, sams dog. maggee. sam turning computer off with feet. sam lights his lighter. its working!!!! do we have any candy? i don't know. but goddamn i would do anything for some chocolate right now. once upon a time there was a giraffe that was really lonely at the zoo. so then me, ashley, and sam totally broke in and set the giraffe free. popcorn. zoo walls. burn. light it on fire. it smells really bad. is that me? i don't know.i smell like burritos. FRIJOLES. TOMATES. LECHUGA. QUESO. JAMON. TORTILLA. LEON. que? que es esto? recibi un oso. un oso en casa? no lo creo. es muy grande y yo no quiero un oso. QUE HORRIBLE. QUE DESASTRE. quiero un sanwich con queso, lechuga, carne, y una jirafa. QUE?!??!!? MI mochila es muy grande porque tengo una jirafa y la jirafa vive en mi mochila. samuel, no puedo vivir sin ti. porque estoy enamorado de ti. me gusta hablar espanol todos los dias cuando estoy en la casa de sam. el padre de sam habla espanol porque es mexicano.

ok so my name is jason and i smell like burritos. i eat sour cream and frosting out of the containers. i make a full on fucking meal out of that. laksjdflkadsfklajsdf. laksjdlakjsdflkajdlfkjasdf. lakjdflkajsadslfkjsf. no. i dont know what to do i am so afraid. there are monsters on the floor and if my feet touch the ground the monsters will bite my toes off. ok.

so i have a dog, and her name is jueves. she is really little and she shakes all of the time. butshe is so cute and she is so lovey and i just don't know what to do with her. but her maja was ran over by my aunt. but thats ok because i have jueves and she is the bomb. hoof. goat. goat hooooooof. i have nailpolish on my finger and i dont want it there. i can't really see what i am typing but its ok because i've got jason to correct me when i make mistakes. thank you jason you are such a good friend. i really don't know what i would ever do without you. sup im chewy.

ok. so at my grandpas house he has this feed room where we keep all of the food for the animals. so when its time to feed the chickens i pour the scratch on the ground. but when its time to feed the horses i put a couple scoops in for the horses, but then i eat some myself because its so damn good. omg there are these little chunks of corn and they are coated with this sweet chewy stuff and it is soo good. i used to bring some for lunch with me to school. i love it.

chicken fried rice. with sweet and sour sauce on everything. ok. bye.

(14 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

am i really that bad?? [04 Feb 2005|04:31pm]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | *the sounds of sam's house* ]


What Is Your Best Sexual Skill?
Name:
Age:
Sex:
Sexuality:
Flirting Skill Level - 83%
Kissing Skill Level - 91%
Cudding Skill Level - 87%
Sex Skill Level - 19%
Why They Love You You are too sexy for words.
Why They Hate You You're too good to be true.
This fun quiz by lady_wintermoon - Taken 1510725 Times.
</a>
New - COOL Dating Tips and Romance Advice!

(5 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

baby got back [25 Jan 2005|09:26pm]
[ mood | silly ]
[ music | d.v.d.a. - what would brian boitano do ]

so we got a new puppy, it's a miniature pincher, she's really small and cute. i'd put up a picture, but i don't have a camera or the know-how.

whitney needs to find me a girl because i found her a guy.

lastly, jessica has a big ass. oh man, that thang is huge. she's got dumps like a truck, truck, truck; thighs like what, what, what. she's got the junk in the trunk, she's blazin' the funk, she's got the ba-dunk-a-dunk, she's got some gear in the rear, she's haulin' a tranny in the fanny, she's got some squish in the toosh, she's plump in the rump. why am i writing about jessica's big ass... i have no idea.

(16 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

new do [23 Jan 2005|10:12pm]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | frou frou - let go ]

so i bleached the front right part of my hair, it doesn't look too bad for doing it myself.

i wanna get one of those cool coats with the fur-lined hoods, does anyone know where i could find one?

i also want to get some big, tacky glasses, anyone know where i can find some moderately cheap ones?

(19 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

i'll put a better title later... [21 Jan 2005|07:42pm]
[ mood | okay ]
[ music | frankie goes to hollywood - relax ]

so here's the list of what i want in my future girlfriend.

i want a girl who:

*is trustworthy
*won't cheat
*is attractive, inside and out
*finds me attractive, inside and out
*gets jealous, but not crazy jealous
*finds me amusing
*is affectionate
*dresses cute
*will help me go shopping and pick out good stuff
*is thin to chubby
*understands that i turn into an asshole when i'm tired and will take a nap with me
*will take showers/baths with me
*will take road trips with me
*isn't bitchy
*gives me massages
*can make me laugh
*doesn't lie
*i can respect
*wants a serious relationship
*doesn't smoke, drink, or do drugs
*isn't a slut, skank, ho, hussy, hood rat, chicken head, harlet, jezebel, etc...
*likes or tolerates some of the same music, movies, and shows i do
*isn't a hypocrite
*has enough time for me
*has class, manners, and self respect
*doesn't talk about other guys
*talks to little to none of her exes and is over all of them
*will go camping with me (if i ever decide to go camping)
*will drive a lot of the time, because i hate driving
*smells good/has good breath
*will be there when i need her
*comes up with good ideas of things to do
*doesn't flake out
*will tell me if something is bugging her
*has goals and some brains
*has nice hair
*surprises me
*doesn't complain all the time
*talks about interesting things, but is okay with complete silence
*hasn't done stuff with people i know
*chews with her mouth closed
*will tell a bitch what's up if she tries to get fresh with me

i'll write more when i think of them...

(6 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

explooooosion!!! [19 Jan 2005|11:37pm]
[ mood | depressed ]
[ music | 'big fish' ]

joe and i are supposed to make a list of what we want in our next girlfriend, but we're not about that. i'll probably end up making a list eventually, so some girl who likes me can read it and it can crush her hopes, or step on them a little bit. my chest hurts and i don't know why. i still have no job, but i'll fix that. i think i'll get a haircut soon, so my hair can look all nice when i'm going around job huntin'. anyone wanna wax my back? i've felt sad for quite some time and i wish i knew what was causing it. fuckin' a, emotions suck. joe and whitney are watching 'big fish'. the last two times i've spent the night at whitney's, jessica didn't stay over, which totally sucks, not that she cares, but still. i'd write more, but there's certain people i don't want reading certain things.

(5 Slapped Me | Slap Me)

who wants one? [28 Dec 2004|12:05pm]
[ mood | determined ]
[ music | obie trice - got some teeth ]

entrancing
You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.


What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

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